First dates can be really scary. It’s nerve-racking to put yourself out there, especially with someone you barely know. Honestly, first dates may suck, but unfortunately, they’re pretty necessary in the world of dating. They’re where you make your first impression, and they help in deciding whether or not there will be a second date. Learn to master the first date and never let your nerves get in the way again by following these 7 tips!
Put yourself in a positive state of mind.
Like I said, first dates can be terrifying, so, before you embark on one, try to get yourself in a positive mindset and calm your nerves. This might mean meditating for 10 minutes, or jamming out to your favorite playlist while you get ready. Sometimes, it helps to have a friend there with you, pumping you up as you do your hair. The most nerve-racking part of a first date is definitely the time leading up to it. So, make the prep fun and you’ll be feeling better when you finally sit down with your date.
Pick the perfect outfit.
Finding the perfect first date outfit seems kind of impossible. You want your date to open the door and think, “wow!” but you also want to keep it cool and causal. Strike the right balance by pairing your cutest jeans with an off-the-shoulder tee or a strappy tank—something that’s a little more fun than you’re go to school look. You don’t want to wear something you wouldn’t normally rock, however. Your outfit should be a good representation of you. In general, opt for your favorite top or lucky pair of boots so you’re feeling confident and comfortable throughout the night.
Give a quick and cool hello.
Even if you and your date text all the time, the first moment of a real-life date can be the scariest part— so much buildup! Keep your cool and calm their jitters by giving them a warm hi and a quick hello hug. When they see how cool you’re playing it, not only will they be impressed, but they’ll also start to calm down too.
Another way to diffuse the awkwardness is by making a joke (“Full disclosure: I changed three times!”). They’ll realize you don’t take yourself too seriously and once you guys get a good laugh in together, you’ll be ready to start the night and have some fun.
Keep the convo moving.
First dates can sometimes feel like a job interview. Both parties are trying to gain all the info they can on each other, and the back and forth questioning can seem insincere. It’s totally normal to want to know everything about the person you’re on a date with, but just realize that’s going to take some time. Instead of shooting questions at your date, ask them one and then let a conversation build from there. If they love rap music, start discussing that! Don’t just move on to the next question on your list.
Offer to split the check.
If you think your date might pick up the check and you’re not sure how much food to order, ask them what they’re getting. It’s a totally nonchalant, normal question and then you can choose something around the same price. When the check comes, offer to split it. If they really insist on paying, thank them and maybe next time offer to get ice cream on you.
Let them know you want to go out again.
As the night is coming to a close, if you decide you want to see your date again, let them know. You can be up front (“We should totally do this again sometime”), or you can be more coy about it. If you don’t want to be too forward, bring up something referenced earlier in the conversation. If they discussed how much they love playing Fortnite, try something like, “So, when are you going to show me your Fortnite skills?” That will show them you’re interested in seeing them again, and it will make them excited to share one of their favorite interests with you.
If you want to kiss them, let it be known.
Don’t just wait for your date to make the move. When you’re parting for the night, linger a little, maybe even lightly touch their arm. Let it be known that you’re open for a good night kiss. If they’re not receptive, fine, but if they are, it could be magical. Of course, if you’re not comfortable with kissing them, no prob! There’s nothing that says you have to kiss. Even if they pay for the dinner, you don’t owe your date anything.
By Carolyn Twersky and Elisa